Eat Yo Vegetables! Eat Them!

My parents would be rolling in their graves. Fortunately, they are both still quite alive, but if they were not, they would be. For many years I brushed away their warnings about the effects of the college atmosphere on a young mind. Me – a liberal? A hippy? A Socialist nut-job? Ha! Never!
Well I was wrong, and they were right. I’ve gone over for sure now. Soon I’ll be dancing naked around Redwoods or camping outside financial institutions or attacking people wearing faux fur. Who knows, I might even - *gasp* - vote for Obama in 2012!
Nah, that’d be too much. But I think it’s time for me to come out about some other things. I’ve gone vegetarian.
Wait! Don’t throw away the invitation you were about to send me for your Christmas party! I will still eat the turkey you slaved over for hours! I’m not a real vegetarian!
Well, I am, but I’m tolerant of other lifestyles. If you invite me to your place for hamburgers I will eat them, and I will enjoy them. Just don’t expect a steak when you come to visit me.
I like meat, I do. But there are just so many good reasons not to eat it. For one thing, the process of meat production is disgusting. It’s wasteful, unsanitary, and just plain cruel. I’m sure we’ve all heard slaughterhouse horror stories; from the disturbingly large amount of hormones pumped into our meat to the brutal conditions animals are made to live in.
Then there’s the sustainability argument. I’m not going to say I’ve gone over to the doomsday camp, but we do live in a growing world. Food shortages are no stranger to many areas of the planet, and as the population increases so will the strain on resources. It takes five times more grain to feed a beef cow than it does to feed a human. Do we really want to be filling up arable land with meat animals and feed for those animals when it could be put to much more efficient use?
And eating vegetarian isn’t just good for the world; it’s good for your health. Meat, even the healthier free-range kind, is full of extra fat, and more protein than we really need. A quarter pound burger contains half the protein needed daily, plus over 300 calories and 20 grams of fat. That's not even the fast-food kind, which I'm not about to get into. Eating a well-balanced vegetarian meal can provide all the nutrients you need with less of the stuff you really don’t need.
But humans are carnivorous, you might protest. We need meat! No, humans are omnivores. We can eat meat in a pinch, but our bodies prefer the alternatives. And you know, despite its deliciousness, meat is kind of boring. Beyond the three great divides of poultry, fish, and red meat it all has basically the same taste, texture, and color. Fruits, vegetables, and nuts come in a much wider variety.
Finally – and we’re getting to the heart of the matter here – I’m lazy and broke. Meat is hard to prepare well and it’s expensive.
So there, I’m out. You can jump down my throat if you like. Or you could join me. Yeah – sounds good right? Ha, who I am I kidding. It’s going to take more than a blog to win you all over. I mean, it’s taken me three years of flip-flopping and struggling will power. Oh well, I can’t change the world. Oh wait, I just did. I changed myself, and so the world is different. Just a little. But you know how the rest of the argument goes.